One Simple Rule For Acing Life
By Leo Gura - September 15, 2015 | 110 Comments
If you follow this one principle, you will become massively successful
Stefan says: Yeah, your parents got such a terrible result…
Ramona says: The emotional difficult thing while watching you is to question what you are saying each and every time. Good, yet common sense advice you gave today. I have a question: how do you remember what pantomime you’ve already used?
Ramona says: I lied. The difficult thing to do is to accept your point of view as valid. SOMETIMES.
Elton says: start meditating .
alexandria kelly says: THANKS Leo. I know that teaching ungrateful, abusive people
is the emotionally difficult thing too… sorry they are so bad.
Jackie says: I agree with Alexandria. Leo your work resonates such truth with me. I am learning so much and greatly respect your hard work, wisdom, and obvious passion for your life’s work. You are making a tremendous difference in my life and in the lives of anyone who is living with an open heart, open mind, and the willingness to dig deep into their being and take a long honest look at their own psychology, emotional responses, and patterns of behavior. Today’s video is as insightful as your other videos. They are gems. You are an amazing soul, and you are doing God’s work. It takes courage to listen and think outside the box — to stretch and grow — to live as mindful beings. You are helping the collective heal by helping individuals develop tools to heal their pain, master their psychology, and live in higher consciousness. Amen, peace, and great appreciation to you.
rem 
Elliot says: Yet another fantastic video Leo. Thanks for the much needed kicks up the arse!
William says: Thanks Leo for sharing this with “your lazy friend”. Lol!
Tomas says: Ehh… It’s good that you do what you do Leo, and I know that nobody can turn you back from this path. Thank you
Sal says: Thanks Leo
Andrea Hayes says: What a great insight. I just finished Madame Bovary which very eloquently demonstrates this truth. I have found that life becomes thin and empty when I take the foot off the pedal and start looking for the shortcuts. On the other hand, when I continuously make the choice to confront reality head on; I increase my ability to withstand that tension, and with enough persistence, I bust through some internal wall. Beyond the challenge, a whole new dimension of reality lies waiting, like Leo referenced. Joy and beauty and transcendent awareness. If you don’t take the challenge, you lie stagnant in a wasteland of your own soul. If people could collectively understand this principle, on a societal level, some really exciting shit would commence.
Nicole says: My friend is dying of breast cancer because she always took the emotionally hard path. She accomplished amazing things but may die at 34. Worth it?
Leo Gura says: Why are you so sure of the cause of her cancer?
Lisa says: Two things you said (I think… if I heard correctly at 28 0) was by doing what is emotionally difficult you will have amazing health and amazing finances . I take issue with those two, especially because illness can strike even when one takes fantastic care of one’s self (ask someone with Lyme disease, MS or any degenerative progressive disorder) and that can lead to financial ruin. Besides, having lots of money isn’t what makes one successful, is it? Isn’t having the will power to push on in the face of devastating circumstances and learning to live with less an unweasel-like behavior? Please clarify, Leo.
Leo Gura says: Yes, of course, you could get run over by a bus tomorrow and all your personal development efforts will have been in vain. Such is life.
I am giving you strategies for life. A correct strategy is correct even if the outcome happens to turn out negative.
For example, as a correct strategy of life, you should have protected sex rather than unprotected sex. Yet it’s still possible that while having protected sex you catch AIDS and die while by having unprotected sex you never catch anything and live happily ever after simply from blind luck. Nevertheless, this does not invalidate the correct strategy.
As for money and success, I would not consider a person successful unless he or she has mastered how to create value in the world and earn a decent living. This is not to say that money = happiness. Money in fact has nothing to do with happiness.
Nihi says: Sounds to me like an excuse for you not to do what you are supposed to…
Natasha says: I had breast cancer 4 years ago, and the emotionally difficult thing I did was not going back to the conventional oncolog who tried to push the Big Pharma’s protocol (chemo, radiation, Tamoxifen). When I said no, he said I would die within the following 2 years. That didn’t scare me into compliance. Instead, I did the emotional difficult thing and put myself through a through body detox, changed my diet to wholesome, organic food from the earth, alkalinized my body, stocked up on quality supplements, reduced the stress level (including breaking up with a fiance of 5 years), hit the gym and sauna 3 times a week. I have been doing all this consistently and it has become my lifestyle, my permanent remission. Sometimes the most emotional difficult thing to do is not to follow the accepted conventional thinking patterns and have the confidence to think for yourself. This can save your life, like it did mine.
arnie says: Hey Leo
Is there any actual physical or mental damage you can get by permanently resisting the “orders” of your brain, expressed through the emotions? At least it sometimes feels so.
I experienced the joy of going against my emotions recently. I pushed it really hard, sometimes I nearly cried due to the emotional pain. Is this a sign of growth or a warning from your body to you?
In addition: Is there a stage in one’s development when this principle doesn’t apply anymore? I mean, if you worked so much on yourself that the right thing to do is actually the one your emotions draw you to? Or is the weasel-mentality hardwired so that it is impossible to override it completely?
Thanks in advance
Arnie
Leo Gura says: Doing the emotionally difficult thing is NOT the same thing as stressing yourself to death. That’s NOT what I’m suggesting.
Even if you train yourself for decades, things will still be emotionally difficult I think. Perhaps only with enlightenment (and still decades more follow-up training) could you transcend it.
But it’s true that as you build good habits and put your life together, doing the healthy things will become more natural and easier. Still not effortless, but easier.
Andrea Hayes says: Arnie – Great questions. I reached a limit myself today, where I was pushing myself so hard that I almost started crying with frustration. I usually push myself as hard as I possibly can until I reach a wall, and then I have to stop and alleviate the pressure for a bit. Watch a movie. Take a nap. I feel like it resets my mind and that I’m able to tackle the problem with a fresh perspective after that. I think it’s really intuitive, to know how hard to push yourself, and then when to let your foot off the break. It’s a real dance. I’ve been trying to figure it out for years.
What I’ve found about cultivating self-discipline, is that it DOES get easier. My choices become more and more intrinsically linked to the outcomes they lead to, which kind of deadens immediate gratification effect. For example, I don’t really enjoy a milkshake from Dairy Queen anymore because I know it will make my stomach hurt and that I’ll end up feeling sad and fat the next day. I think that your mind learns to more quickly associate those long term consequences with the whatever choice you make, so it does eventually become more ‘automated’ to make the disciplined choice. Have you also found that to be true?
This video made me think of verse Matthew 7:13 – 7:14.
Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.
It seems like this ‘choosing the path of greatest emotional difficulty’ is really key to finding that ‘narrow gate’, through which we access the metaphorical realm of ‘heaven’. Or, in terms of dharma, it would be a great way to gauge the ‘path of righteousness. I am really digging this video!
James says: Always do what feels emotionally most difficult to do…
…unless you’re already operating from a healthy paradigm of growth over comfort.
…unless the emotionally most difficult thing to do is wantonly dangerous & irresponsible.
…unless you take this so far that you end up afraid of getting too comfortable & find yourself restless, unable to have healthy relationships & end up incapable of relaxing.
…unless you’re already doing shadow work & are coming to accept & integrate the rejected parts of your subconscious. Some of those most emotionally difficult of things, you should definitely not do.
Anita van den Bossche says: I have been looking for this kind of wisdom. It is a great subject! LOTS of work to do, but it gives me The reassurance that I am on the good path, even if others around me try to sabotage me and I have difficulties in keeping on track. It’s easy to think: If everyone around me think about it like this, my natural laziness is telling me to quit being so complicated, I just should give up as this would be The right thing to do. But I have a couple of good experiences that keep me on track. I remember how good I felt and I get motivated to go on.
I am now much older and those experiences lay way behind me, so I still give in too much.
This video will be my reminder that what I believe is good for me oppositie to what my tendency is, is actually The good path to follow.
Thanks Leo!
me says: brilliant! thank you
Your videos always piss me off .That’s when I know I am hearing something I need to pay attention too . thanks for all you do . Thom
Tiago says: Holy shit.
I really wasn’t expecting that.
Nihi says: The emotionaly easy thing is to watch Leos latest video instead of doing what I have to do. I think I have to unsubscribe from your newsletter cause it triggerd my procrastination about 1 hour ago. Writing this comment btw. is the emotionaly easy thing as well. Fuck!
Gotta go!
(And of course I won’t unsubscribe, since its the only newsletter that brings true value to me).
Hello Leo
Thank you Leon for this very generous guidance, I am French and thanks God that I speak fluently English to be able to follow your videos.
I do want to make a big change in my life, I am ready for it, aged 59 I want to
make the best out of the years to come.
All the best
Brigitte
Thank you Leo, another excellent video. A question, which I hope you will answer to: My entire life has been spent OUT of the comfort zone…now I would like to have a more comfortable life, that is not on the way though. But am I not right to seek some easy way after battling all the time?
Raffaella,Italy
Leo Gura says: If you truly spent a majority of your life out of your comfort zone, you wouldn’t need to battle anything anymore, you’d be all set.
Don’t confuse living a self-actualized life with fighting battles. Just the opposite. It’s the lazy people who fight and struggle because they keep failing to do the emotionally difficult things early on.
Wow, I had never thought in those terms. Thank you very much!
Raffaella
Lin says: I am in tears–amazing video!!!!!! I stopped my work to write a thank-you — I can’t describe how grateful for this video and all of Leo’s teaching!!!!!!! I finally understand why I did the thing I really don’t want to do. I must have the emotional strength to do the right thing!!!! What a beautiful life I can do to put in persistent, honest, emotionally hard work.
This is one of my favorites of favorites of all my personal development. The “magic pill” are not good, bad for anyone. There will be no respect for myself later down the road if I take the “short cut”!!!!
I love your teaching, unmatched by anyone I know! Deeper than Tony Robbins and Tim Ferriss and others (Tony and others are great and I appreciate their teaching too but they are great in other aspects of learning). Only Leo gives me the explanation and brilliant insight into life issues. My own honest opinion. Absolutely a fan of actualized.org. Leo is my true hero. Thank you so much for your generosity and phenomenal teaching!!!!
Jen says: I am curious, how does one know that someone is dying of breast cancer because they always took the emotionally difficult road? That is quite an assumption — I am sure it had nothing to do with environmental factors, GMO food, lifestyle choices her genetics and today’s toxic culture in general.
I don’t think Leo is saying to burn yourself out taking such a rough path that you make yourself sick. People are taking his advice to an extreme…he is not talking about developing a “Type A” personality overnight — that DOES cause illness due to stress, over time. He is talking about not always taking the easy way out. Listening to your biological self saying “oh, this is easier” and NOT doing that. Doing the other thing — the thing that will make you a better person in the end. The thing that most people wouldn’t choose.
I just don’t believe that striving to be the best person you can be would contribute to breast cancer. Sorry, that is a stretch.
Great video Leo. Thanks!
John D says: Brilliant Leo..Keep Going!!!
Gracious Gratitude for every video and all the changes you’ve brought about in many lives
John says: Oh my goodness–this is my 4th time listening to it as soon as I saw it out today…on the bus, then walking to work from the bus stop…I can’t put it down.
Today I changed. Today is that special day that I will make a difficult change I have been wanting to do. I am more determined than ever. I understand what was in my way! My day and life are changed!
How can I thank you, Leo?
I want to live a fulfilled life and “die happy” because I did the right thing.
Seeking emotional comfort may feed into our personal and the world’s problems.
Do the hard thing, wiping away the tears when making an emotionally painful decision. Know that in the end that is most rewarding.
For the fellow listener above, on the point of whether continuing doing the emotionally difficult thing when you have done that your whole life already, I think if one lose this principle, what have worked so hard to get will gradually lose. Keep the big principle on crucial things. Relax here and there on trivial things are just smart and being a human! Keep the principle.
What he just reminded all of us is that how hard it can be to keep doing it after you think you get it! The temptation are always there.
But it doesn’t mean you can’t relax sometimes on minor things. A balance you decide in your mind and heart.
Thanks for the video, it really helped to vindicate my observation that societal life has gotten just a bit too easy and a bit too convenient. Also I suggest that your next video be based on the issue of death and mortality. “You always say life is short”, I am curious as to how death is related to personal development as well as its role in general society and in our personal lives.
Suzanne says: I am just starting on this journey and there is so much to learn but this video really clicked with me today especially the part about the 300 pound woman. This is exactly what I do and I can see it is because I want to choose the easy path. So glad I decided to watch it. Thanks.
Caelis says: Leo! The points you are making here are so f cking REAL and TRUE!
I am going to be really honest with you now, I have already been living my life this “challenging” way for a few years. And what you say is right, and still there is a lot more for me to learn I am fully aware of that. But hey I am willing to do that.
I am willing and have already been dropping a lot of “cool stuff” like having amazing sex, eating amazing food etcetera. Really love that stuff ofcourse like everyone else does. But that really isn’t neccasary for me anymore. Right now I am only focussing on self actualization for the sake of the universe man! Because I know that that is important!
And I know that you know that too! And that is what I really appreciate!
So I want to take on every world challenge that helps the world heal and brings back the connection between the spirit, mind and body for everyone! Everything is already there, we just have to wake up
Please teach me all that I need to know! There are a lot of things I want to do alone, challenges I want to take on alone
But I just know that this is something we need to do together!
We need as many perspectives as possible to find beautiful creative solutions together to all the problems we’ve caused.
A new fresh start, world without boarders but cultures learning and working together!
Lena says: Leo- Dead on! 100% true, it’s just inarguable lol.
I’m a stay at home Mom… Beyond challenging to live outside the comfort zone (sitting for 1 whole hour un-interupterd, not even an option) but I push through!
Ella says: Thank you for this great video!
It feels like it’s always easier to take the easy, light way that
take less effort. We always know what
Is right and knowing , most of the times is easy
But taking the step to do it is hard.
Your argument makes arguing with my self hell lot easier because I can
Just follow a simple rule: do what’s harder emotionally
But it comes with major awareness- isnt this awareness intuitive?
Basically my unconscious emotional self already knows the answer and chooses
The easier way because it’s lazy and I have to force it back on track ..
Your rule rocks ! And it’s true every time!
Liz says: Hi Leo,
Thank you for giving yourself to us in the way that you do. I appreciate your honesty and the work that goes into each of your talks. I am interested to hear more on the topic you mentioned in this talk about holding onto your integrity and work ethic in business. It feels like we are drowning in a sea of operators who are only interested in the less emotionally challenging thing to do and who are not really interested in the best outcome for the client, which drives quality and prices down, thus nurturing a lower standard in society. My husband and I are in the building business and we were just having this conversation this morning before I watched your video. We are in Australia and the problem is just as rife. Thanks in advance for more insight on this and have a great day.
Jim says: Great video as always. Thanks man.
Best video on here, thank you so much! IVe been meditating 20 mins a day for the past two months now but really want to push myself further now x
Mary says: Can I ask a question? Did you get significant results after 2 months of meditation?
Elton says: Hey Mary, I’ve been meditating since few months now, I’ve been getting amazing results really really amazing results..
Mary says: Hey Leo,
So Leo, can you tell me what are the ways that intelligent, hardworking can end up getting terrible results?
Leo Gura says: By not undertaking a serious study of practical psychology and wealth-creation.
John G says: Superb Leo!! I’ve been watching your vids now for only a week or so. All of them (the 8 or 9 that i have watched) are great and very helpful. Your articulation and insight into the topics you speak of is much appreciated by many I’m sure. Thank you so much and metta.
Stephanie Meyer says: You are amazing, Leo! Thank you for this.
Leo, I have to say it has made a tremendous difference in my way of thinking since I found you on you tube..awesome, thank you.
Leo I need to know what you think about marijuana.
Elton says: It doesn’t work and it has very short term pleasures and its not comparable to true bliss and happiness… If you treat your body as a temple would you put that in it? Also is it emotionally easy or difficult to smoke it?
Leo Gura says: I haven’t done it so technically-speaking I don’t know. But I bet it’s not doing you much good.
Yelena Kudra says: Leo, I don’t know how to reconcile “doing the emotionally difficult thing” and “effortless action” mentioned in just about all Eastern philosophies. What are your thoughts on this?
Leo Gura says: Effortless action in Eastern traditions? Haha, you should read about the Marathon Monks of Mount Hiei.
https /en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kaih%C5% gy%C5%
What Easterners do in their spiritual pursuits to make their actions “effortless” would make your ears wilt just from listening to it.
John G says: Just read the thing about the marathon monks. Cool! Maybe one day I’ll check it out for real, no b.’s.
Alex says: Makes me laught, when I tried to apply that principle to different situations in my thoughts I was like “That’s what is most emotionaly difficult… Yeah of course I it’s the right thing to do… ” And then came the reaction ” BUT IT’S F……..HARD , I CAN’T DO THAT” and over bullshit of that kind lol
Your videos help a lot, it’s hard but enjoyable work .
So thanks !
Tony says: Hey Leo,
Another good one. Would you consider doing a video on how to do shadow work? You mentioned shadow work in some video as a method of personal therapy. Also by chance does one of the books on your book list pertain to shadow work at all?
Thanks
Tony
Leo Gura says: I will shoot a video on shadow work for sure. I’m still inexperienced in it and I’ll be reading up on it some more.
Books will be added to the list once I’ve found and read a good one.
Fernando says: Leo, your hard work is greatly appreciated. Once more you amazed me with your intellect and deep conversations. I’m always listening to your videos with my headphones, gym, house, car. Keep up the good work!! Also, keep uploading them to podcast.
Ps. Buying your book list was a great choice. I’m currently reading Peter ralstons book (the book of not knowing). Best of lucks to you! From San Diego, CA.
kumar shubham says: incomparable passion that you have…. you are a revolution to human species
you are inspiration TRULY
Dave says: Because of you I did some hard sh!+ today and didn’t weasel out. Baby steps. It turned out good. Amen Brother
Chocolate drenched bacon.. haha I love it!
The men in my family, on my fathers side, have furthered the idea, down through generations, that one should “always take the narrow road”.
It’s kind of the same rule I believe and I have always tried (I thought) to follow it. How ever after having listened to this video I realize that in many areas of my life I haven’t.
Very strange to me now to realize this, but it’s true!
I have used this “golden rule” very selectively so that it has fit my individual state of mind. So even though I did get this information “with my blood”, so to speak, I have been able to trick my self, in many areas of life, and behave like a weezle without being conscious about it.
I’m my own worst enemy for sure!
Sandra Howard says: Thank you Leo – amazing podcast! My husband and I just had our Haha moment listening to you. We have been at a major crossroad for the past two years or more, talking about changing our life radically. However, we have not made that leap of faith yet its still a dream – so,the questions is – why are we stll talking about it and not doing it? We are holding onto our comfort zone – our fear of failure, our perceived negative beliefs our friends may have, making the wrong decision, and various other Emotional weasel(s) – wow! Very profound – thank you.
Kirk says: Bro, yesterday I didn’t weasel! What a day! …”stop weasel!” I told myself
Whenever I felt giving in these two days, I am listerning to it again! I felt the pain of resisting my emotion and brain giving in to the comfort and pleasure of the very thing that I know is not good for me…Kirk, don’t give in, don’t, don’t!
Intense battle! Grueling war against myself I felt
Definitely not cozy little battle
But I want to do the right thing, too much at stake! Please don’t screw myself, Kirk. Help me, the almighty! Don’t be tempted.
Sylvain says: Once again, you hit the nail right on the head!! Thank you!!
Smith says: My life has been going great and recently I was accidentally been knocked off track with a huge emotionally extremely tempting challenge I must confront. I have been crying and want the easy thing that is no good for anyone yet you could not fight it off…this video is like a hammer hit right on my head…I am determined and I will work through the challenge and not get lost. Conquer my own inner demon. Leo, thank you, my true hero, even at my tender age of 60! Thank you
amal says: Hi, Leo .
this video reminded me of Maslow’s saying _u said befor_ that we always have the choice between comfort and growth in everyday situation..
c says: I guess this is going to give everyone here a few laughs lol!…..I’m going to do something emotionally very difficult right now……
Leo- I think you’re really cute! I’m sure you must get told that a lot. You probably have a ton of girls chasing you now! Are you single? lol! I enjoy listening to and watching your videos and it’s helped me evolve into the person that I am today. I have learned so much from you.
La says: Yes, Leo,
I too find you charismatically gorgeous, hot and sexy, but I won’t try to show off how much I know in a somewhat embarrassing effort to hit on you.
Love your content, and you explain it in a way that makes it easy to understand too.
Thank you.
c says: The second thing I wanted to say is I’m going to have to disagree with you about , that it’s not in your favor to change, and that, you’re hurting yourself by bringing this forward to your viewers. Let me explain.
I work in the Holistic field as a Nationally Certified Master Hypnotherapist and a weight loss coach, and I’m constantly continuing to expand my knowledge. Hopefully soon as a Reiki Master.
The TRUTH is, it’s in your favor to change. There are more positive benefits to changing than to staying at where you are. It’s the “PERCEPTION” that it’s hard to change is what makes it hard. Change can be easy if you believe it to be that way. YES CHANGE CAN BE EASY! I’ve seen it happen, and I’ve experienced it myself! You are what you believe yourself to be! You are a SUCCESS! You have to accept yourself for the wonderful person as you are now, to create even more SUCCESS!
We have two parts of our mind: the CONSCIOUS MIND, our logic and will power, and our SUBCONSCIOUS MIND, the part of our mind where we create habits, beliefs and behaviors. Our conscious mind is only 12 percent of our brain while our subconscious mind is 88 percent. These statistics show that our beliefs, habits and behaviors hold way more weight than our logic and will power. That’s why for example: people who struggle to lose weight, and know the diet, and know they need to exercise, don’t lose the weight because they hold onto a belief, habit or behavior in their mind that is more powerful than the changes they desire to make.
The key to SUCCESS and to creating changes in your life is a POSITIVE MINDSET. It’s the BELIEF that you can lose the weight, and that you can overcome the sweets and the cravings, and overcome your laziness to exercise, etc.
A lot of people that struggle with weight loss “eat emotionally”, as a stress coping mechanism. They eat the tub of ice cream when the boyfriend breaks up with them, or reach for the cookies and the sweets when anything negative happens in their life, etc. The key to over coming the struggle is to deal with the ROOT CAUSE. WHY are they using food as a stress coping mechanism? HOW did this come about? You would be surprised how far the rabbit hole goes…and everyone is different in reasons. Some people originally picked up this stress coping mechanism with food from years ago…here’s a wild example that I’ve seen happen…they used food to replace smoking habits, and the smoking habits was used as a coping mechanism to deal with divorcing the wife. And when you address that …the “root cause”….and it doesn’t have to be this crazy emotional thing. You don’t have to emotionally traumatize people with past abuses….and nightmares…etc. You just acknowledge that it’s there, you realize that’s what caused the stressful eating. Sometimes you have to forgive too!! That’s a big thing! And then you focus on the positive…WHY you want to lose weight, creating reasons that are right for them, That they BELIEVE, that will create motivation, and burning desire to change.
Change can be a good thing! Change can be exciting, passionate and fun!
A lot of people that may be reading this may realize that this correlates with THE SECRET or aka The LAW OF ATTRACTION or you could also call it Creative Visualization. The LAW OF ATTRACTION has been used in the Holistic field way before THE SECRET DVD came about. You don’t have to believe that it works on any kind of spiritual level for it to happen (although I’ve found evidence that it does, if you do enough research in quantum physics, mechanics, quantum entanglement, you can find it, etc.. But however, logically speaking it is easy to assimilate that just changing your mindset to a POSITIVE MINDSET, changes your output and attitude, thus changes how you treat people, and react in certain situations, thus causing positive outcomes in your life.
And if you struggle with changing your beliefs, habits and behaviors, and need help changing that, Leo is the right guy to talk about with those things! He is more than qualified to do so as a life coach. As you can obviously see, he cares about his viewers and their best interests. He has the wisdom and the knowledge, and I find him to be very down to earth and easy to relate to, and someone who has gone through the same circumstances and experiences as his viewers. And these ingredients make a great recipe for an awesome coach.
And no, no one put me up to this… I’m not getting any brownie points for writing this here. lol I also do generally care about others and their outcomes.
c says: sorry, for the grammatical errors, I kept getting error messages to take out all special characters… didn’t know which ones it was referring to.. so I took out all explanation points, or quotation marks, etc.
Ok, I put in my words for today. Good night lol
IOP says: Gracias!
Nell says: Thank you. I’ve been following you for few months now. I can see changes in my life and I am greatful to you. I wish you well and thank you thank you thank you. You help me.
Hi Leo,
We weren’t born like this, its not in our biology. We are programmed by our culture. As Terence Mckenna would say…Culture is not your friend. We need to reclaim our minds from the social engineers that want you to buy their crap that has been manufactured from the bones of a dying world.
Mihai Verestiuc says: Many thanks Leo, for helping us !
Louise says: Hi Leo,
You have made me believe in myself. I have lived a very shy, destructive life with eating disorder and an abusive boyfriend for the last 6 years. I have been caring what other people think of me and now i have come to realise how selfish i have been. I try to meditate almost 20 min everyday and it gives me a calm i have never before experienced. From having easing disorder since i was 14-15 till 28, these videos and you are a true miracle for me.
I hope you live a very happy life filled with love Leo. You are a true star!
Dan says: Good day Leo, This is my formula for acing life similar to yours. Pain = Pleasure and vice versa Pleasure = Pain.
Dan 
Fred says: I like cat videos
Hey Leo,
Thanks for the video. I agree with you: do what is emotional difficult! I wrote an article a few weeks ago on my blog on a similar topic. I introduced a simple question that I like to ask myself: am I getting rid of my fear an moving toward love. You are right. We must get out of our comfort zone. I totally agree with you diagnostic on society.
Society is “beautifully” tailored to match the collective ego and companies sell us products making us believe that it will solve our problems while we are the only ones who can solve our own problems. Only awareness will change our society.
God bless you, Leo! I have enjoyed 4 or 5 of your videos so far, but this one really moved me. (I can see that you were very moved as you recorded this, which speaks highly of your integrity). You have managed to convey the beauty and grandeur of stoic philosophy into one principle, and it is worth GOLD. Thank you very much. May God grant you the prayers of your stoic heart.
Cheryl says: You are freaking awesome.
April says: Hey, cat videos bring me great joy in life! haha I’m really serious though, not much a good cat video can’t fix!
I’m trying to apply this to my current relationship. Is it more emotionally difficult to stay or more emotionally difficult to leave? Honestly both are emotionally difficult, but the option that would lead to greater growth, is the second. Staying would mean the emotionally difficult way of adapting to someone else’s love style or language and ignoring my own, but leaving would be emotionally difficult because I’d be single again and have to deal with the heartbreak, but it would also ultimately lead me to a new platform where I can grow and expand my knowledge of myself and what I’m looking for in a relationship, and maybe actually one day get me into one where I don’t have to adapt such a huge part of me to be happy.
But generally yes, I agree with the concept, as it happens I have the sign “Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.” taped to the inside of my front door to always remind me that beyond fear is growth.
Craig says: Classic Leo stuff. Thank you very much for all of the effort that you have put into your videos. It has helped me a great deal. Funny Dog videos are good as well.
jesse w says: No way. I half disagree. I agree that Buddhists teach us to accept pain so that we can think more clearly, in order to find a solution. Accepting the pain allows us to not panic in order to complete the steps required to get out of suffering.
We should ONLY choose what is emotionally most difficult, IF we percieve that to be the most productive thing to do, such as lifting a car to save a baby vs pushing your car to work, because that is the most emotionally difficult. We must only accept suffering if we know it will produce a POSITIVE end result, and not EVERY thing that is difficult to do will produce a positive result. Such as choosing to allow a computer repair man fix your computer for $30 vs you doing it yourself, which is most emotionally difficult. You may end up struggling so much trying to fix it, that you may lose $60 in loss of productivity.
Another reason why we must not ALWAYS accept what is most emotionally challenging, is that it is simply a part of life, to accept the good AND the bad. We must accept BOTH emotionally painful, as well as emotionally pleasing situations, such as a family meal together filled with laughter every evening vs the emotionally most difficult, eating alone in your rooms.
We are talking about emotions here, and if we want other people to benefit from our love and respect, they have to be able to accept pleasing emotions, such as “pleased to meet you.” Loving thy neighbors as thyself produces emotional comfort.
Sam says: What are lines of communication, please explain
or guide me to a video…
Ovidiu says: Hey Leo,
I am following you since 3 weeks now, already started doing visualization and positive affirmations. And definitely it is not the easy way, nor anything that is good in life. Beacause good in life is doing the hard, until it becomes easy. But doing the hard is not being stupid or overstressed.
For example I have knee problems (I am 30 years old and there is no apparent reason), but I know for a fact that I came to have these problems because I consistently tried to do the hard thing but in a stupid way. Hard for one month or two after that easy again, son on so forth. Talked to some people (Reiki master and others, that have guided me to find the answer on my own = stress and not adjusting to the environment, inside and out), but also a physician that obviously recommende surgery = the easy way. Fixing the symptoms.. The hard fix is changing my ways, accomplishing what I want by working consistently and controlling my emotions and realizing how I ended up in the first place having knee problems.
I am telling the above, that maybe some people realize that you don’t get a disease by choosing the difficult path. Because the difficult path is doing your best, but not in a stupid way. God gives you what you deserve and more based on the level of effort you put in to your work. If you want more, and don’t realize that it is not natural or it is not the time then you get stressed and you expect more and you are not listening to your body, and the disease it is a sign that you must change your ways. But this is the real hard part, not some stupid career. And I think this is the point the Leo makes so clearly. So in fact it seems like a paradox, only in fact is a way of not accepting reality.
I don’t expect to be understood by many, and I do not seek that either. Only hope that Leo will take this message as a piece of evidence that his work doesn’t go unnoticed but it is realy appreciated!
Best of luck and God bless you Leo!
Jacqui says: Hi Leo,
Thank you for your video. I understand it to be true most of the time, however I dont understand how it can be true 100% of the time. For example, I eat very healthily every day and occasionally treat myself to chocolate which I enjoy. Or I study long hours and sometimes treat myself to a movie to relax. If I go by your philosophy in this video am I to never eat chocolate or watch a movie again? Isn’t this being very hard and unkind to myself? Sorry I think I am confused but if you could clarify that would be great, thanks
Leo Gura says: Use common sense when interpreting my advice.
Mads says: Wow this is really true. Damn. I kinda knew it already but kind ignored it. Most people really are lazy including myself.. this gave me some food for tought. Great video.
Kalle says: Thanks Leo!
Andreea says: Hi Leo,
I know you hear this all the time, but you are amazing.
I appreciate and applaud your work and you efforts and also I am happy that I found those videos (I don’t even know anymore how or from who).
Personal development helps me since only a few months, but has done great things for me.So have you.
Thank you very much Leo !
All the best for you,
Andreea M.
Karol Jaworski says: Great work, mate. Love the fact that you chose to share the synthesis of your mental work. You’ve got a customer.
Sunil says: Brilliant video. This rule applies to so many of your other videos on self control, discipline, habit formation. I have heard a similar famous quote from a big Indian actor. He says “what the mind likes is good, what the mind dosent like is even better”. Thanks for your wisdom. Fall short of words of praise for all the stuff you post.
Leslie says: I enjoy your videos, Leo. Been on a self-help journey all year & have found most of your vids very helpful. I think you may really have issues around fat people. While being fat is giving in to the emotional weasel, so is alcoholism and other addictions. Food addicts just wear it on the outside. I’ve noticed you are especially intolerant of over-weight people. I have found that before I could start losing weight, I had to learn to be kind to myself & not beat myself up. Believe me, when you are overweight, the most counter-intuitive thing to do is be kind to yourself. I am that 300lb, fat, disgusting woman, but I, like everyone else, am a work in progress & I am very proud of how far I’ve come. Again, I think you are great, but be kind to the people who cannot be kind to themselves.
Leo Gura says: I was fat for most of my life. So I know what it’s like. The reason I’m harsh is because it’s plain laziness and carelessness. And the best way to deal with that is a slap across the face to wake up and raise their standards
I’m harsh on addicts of all stripes because it’s just plain stupidity and carelessness.
Margery Kowal says: I have been listening to your videos for about six months now and I want you to know how much I value them. I really, really think about what you teach me and am taking baby steps every day. You have had a profound influence on me. I am a woman in my sixties… just wish that I had found you sooner!
Leo Gura says: Glad folks are sticking around and taking action.
Amy says: Love your videos!!
Marcus Allchorne says: Leo, Your videos are like nothing else, really appreciate all your content man much love
Bruce says: Great insight Leo. It really clicks with me. Thank you for all you do.
Bruce
Ken says: Hey Leo,
I know you have tons of comments so I hope you have the time to respond to mine. Just want to say I have been watching your videos for a little over a week now after stumbling across them on youtube and I cant even begin to explain how big of an impact they have had on my life.
I do have one question though. You talk a lot about the different possibilities in life and how we all have the potential to ace it. You talk about emotional mastery, and choosing to go against the grain, and how in general we can all achieve everything we want in life if we follow this path of self actualization.
I also watched your free will video and I am curious as to how all these ideas can co exist? Is all this stuff really possible? What if someone is predetermined to not live a self actualized life? If they don’t have will power to change their life doesn’t that contradict some of the things you have stated? If they have zero control doesn’t that mean that the possibility of acing life might not exist for them?
I’m a little confused about this and am kind of struggling with what seems to me, two contradicting mindsets. Could you clear this up for me?
I’m a hardworking musician and my dream has always been to be successful and change the lives of others through my music. Is this dream still a possibility for me even if free will is an illusion? What if I’m not predetermined to be a musician? Maybe I’m over thinking this but it’s kind of put me in a slump. I’d like to think I can still achieve whatever I put my mind to.
Hopefully you can help put my mind at ease!
Arwa says: Hey Leo,
could you please upload the transcript
Linzie says: Unfortunately, most people desire a quick fix society where conformity rules :-(
Jane says: Brilliant advice as usual.